At any rate, what is the goal that you have set in place when you're dealing with kids?
Is this designed to show whos is in charge? To instill fear? Or to help the child grow into a decent and self-confident human being?
Good parenting helps foster compassion, honesty, self-reliance, self-control, kindness, cooperation, and cheerfulness, says Steinberg. It also encourages intellectual curiosity, motivation, and desire to achieve. It helps shelter children from developing anxiety, depression, eating disorders, anti-social behavior, and alcohol and drug abuse.
"Parenting is one of the most researched areas in the entire field of social science," says Steinberg, who is a notable professor of Psychology at Temple University in Philadelphia. The scientific proof shows about principles he outlines "is very, very consistent," he tells WebMD.
Too many parents base their actions on inward reaction. But some parents have better dispositions than others, Steinberg says. Kids should never be hit -- not even a slap on a toddler's butt, he tells WebMD. "If your young child is headed into danger, into traffic, you can grab him and hold him, but you should under no circumstances hit him."
Ruby Natale PhD, PsyD, professor of clinical pediatrics at the University of Miami Medical School, couldn't agree more. She opens up a few of her own insights. "Many people use the same system their own parents used, and all of it meant using really rough discipline," she tells WebMD.
A parent's connections with his or her child will be mirrored in the child's actions -- including child manner problems, Natale explains. "If you don't have a good relationship with your kid, they're not going to mind about anything. Think how you associate with other adults. If you have a good kinship with them, you tend to trust them, listen to their beliefs, and sometimes agree. If it's someone we just don't like, we will ignore their opinion."
The list must be in this manner of understanding;
1. Teens want to know they are desired and loved. Hugs, smiles, and kisses should be a daily rite.
2. Teens want to be part of the whole family. They want to help make some choices on things like curfew and vacations, etc.
3. Trustworthy attitude. Trust must be willingly open, but must be justified if broken. No "snooper-vision"; except when trust is broken.
4. Listening is one key to communication. Parents need to understand that the most significant part of communication is listening.
5. Teens actually want rational family rules and want them implemented fairly.
6. Teens be worthy of an honest cause when the answer to a demand is "No."
7. Teens want parents to act an important function in their active, and often baffling, lives.
8. Teens want their parents to show respect for one another. Parents should never, ever, ask the kids to enter into their "debate."
9. Teens wants their parents to be good morale models. Parents should never use the "Do as I say, not as I do" attitude. Parents must lead by criteria.
10. Teens want guidance. Sensible parents will display the way. Never try to live your life over theirs.
Instilling discipline in your children starts with how you treat your kids. Good parenting is about mutual love and respect. Check out more on effective parenting tips:
