One of the best parts of the internet is the ease with which we can pass information about the dumbest things we can find.
Everyday there are criminals caught on Facebook or wild rodents given more blame for strange weather than climate change. Now we have the technology to learn about all of the world’s dumbest news all the time.
The following are some of this week's dumbest stories:
Punxsutawney Phil On The Execution Block
Michael Gmoser, a prosecutor in Ohio, is attempting to hold Punxsutawney Phil, the groundhog that we celebrate on Groundhog’s Day, Feb. 2, every year, accountable for the misrepresentation Phil made of this spring, which hasn’t come as early as Phil claimed or as early as Gmoser wanted.
"Punxsutawney Phil did purposely, and with prior calculation and design, cause the people to believe that spring would come early," Gmoser wrote in an indictment.
Dad’s Got Money For Facebook Photos, But Not Kids
Police in Wisconsin arrested 23-year-old Christopher Robinson for failing to pay child support. Robinson may have been able to argue that he couldn’t afford the payments he was required to make, except for photos on his Facebook profile, showing the father posing with piles of cash and bottles of liquor. Robinson could go to prison for more than a decade.
Folk Singer Insults Gays In San Francisco, Loses Tour
Alt-folk singer from 30 years ago, Michelle Shocked, upset most of an audience at a San Francisco music venue called Yoshi’s last Sunday night. Within two days, almost every other concert scheduled for her subsequent tour was cancelled, mostly following pressure from petitions and social media. She began playing the “Noble Christian vs. Gay Agenda Bullies” card in responses later, but that’s not going to get her any of her gigs back. Maybe she can tour churches.
Cosby Sweaters Are Off-Limits
Bill Cosby sued the owner of CosbySweaters.com recently. The website wasn’t even about the sweaters. Its owner, Kiley Kmiec, said the site is for "sports fans who love music, tech, pop culture, and dumb Internet videos." The name was just a reference, a reference that Cosby’s lawyer did not appreciate.
“[A]s you know, the multi-colored, multi-patterned sweaters that Mr. Cosby wore on ‘The Cosby Show,' an iconic television program that aired from 1984 through 1992 and has continued in broadcast as reruns and in syndication both domestically and internationally through the present, are strongly associated with Cosby,” Cosby’s lawyers wrote. “The term ‘Cosby Sweater' instantly evokes Mr. Cosby and The Cosby Show."
Parents Help Their Kids Get Cancer
This one’s not “haha”-dumb, just plain dumb. A study revealed more and more parents are deciding not to vaccinate their daughters against the Human Papiloma Virus, the leading cause of cervical cancer, because they think they're not old enough to want avoid dying of cancer. Not getting vaccinated is the dumbest.
